Any Kindness Would Be Appreciated

I met a super friendly cook named Anthony while my family and I were in Chicago recently. At least, he used to be a cook.

“The best!” he told my wife and me, with a big toothy smile.

That was before Anthony’s legs got so bad that he could barely stand any more. He lost his job as a chef, and ultimately, his home. Now, the streets are his home. They have been for eight years.

You Are What You Pretend to Eat

Parenthood is great—at first.

Oh, sure, you dads of newborns may feel differently. You’ll whine about the diapers and the midnight feedings and such. But those early months are truly precious, because it’s the only time when you ever have complete, utter power over your children’s lives.

You want to go to the store? They’re going to go to the store. You want them to go to bed? They’re going to go to bed. Sure, maybe they’ll stay awake for hours and hours just to spite you.

Being a Dad is One of the Most Important Things You’ll Ever Fail

Jim Gaffigan just posted the following on Twitter and it got my brain chewing at a furious rate:

Being a father is definitely the most important thing I will fail at in my life.

— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) October 23, 2014

Responses varied. Some chuckled. A few chortled. Several sympathized. Others consoled.

I just chewed… and chewed and chewed. (I think Jim would be proud of me.)

And now, after all the chewing, I think something important is finally dawning on me…

Failures of Epic Proportions…

You’re going to fail at being a father.